I speak with so many people in my professional life who experience insecurity, and in addition to the therapeutic assistance I offer, I tend to give some stock answers that I think all can benefit from – I thought I’d collate some of those answers to form today’s article.
“Don’t let fear or insecurity stop you from trying new things. Believe in yourself. Do what you love. And most importantly, be kind to others, even if you don’t like them.” — Stacy London.
We all have insecure moments, but when they become something you think about all the time, and they plague you, you need to do something about it. Self-Confidence is the assurance of your talents, skills, and abilities. In order to feel secure, you must believe in yourself. Here are a few articles on that topic if you’d like to explore it further:
– Believe in Yourself!
– How To Believe In You – 9 and a bit Ways To Advance Self-Belief.
– Creating Your Superhero Alter-Ego Using Self-Hypnosis To Boost Confidence.
Here are 10 Ways to Feel More Secure when it seems like you’re in an Insecure World.
- Reach out to others for emotional support:
“I have my moments of insecurity and figuring out what’s going on and what I’m supposed to do, but if you don’t push yourself, you’re not growing, so where do you go?” — Selena Gomez.
Although your friends cannot control your emotions, they can certainly affect how you feel about yourself. You need to be reminded that you are loved. Seek friends that encourage you and allow you to express yourself freely.
- Trust Yourself:
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.” — Henry Ford.
You’ve probably heard the person who said, “With my luck, I’d probably never be able to do it.” This person is clearly affirming their disadvantages. If you believe that you cannot do something successfully, you are likely to struggle to succeed. However, if you believe that you can, then you increase the likelihood greatly.
- Take care of your body:
“Unhealthy eating habits cause major health problems, such as diabetes and heart disease, and can also lead to food insecurity, disrupted eating patterns, and low self-esteem.” — Matt Cartwright.
Self-care isn’t a selfish thing. When we’re feeling insecure, different parts of our bodies can tense up, and that tension can be felt by others. Try this: When you’re feeling insecure, stand up and try to identify where the feeling is in your body.
Take a few deep breaths and try to send the breath to that area of your body. Imagine doing so in fact. Then try speaking from that part of your body. You’ll likely see and feel an immediate difference.
- Smile More:
“We live in a culture where we’re bombarded with so much noise and so much insecurity.” — Lisa Ling.
Confident people tend to come across as positive and friendly. Smile, even when you don’t really feel like it. The physical act of smiling releases brain chemicals that will make you feel better, and might even quell some of your nervousness.
- Practice Integrity:
This is one of the biggest way to eliminate your insecurity. Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is watching. What is done in the dark will eventually come out in the light. Practice doing more good when no one is looking than you do when people are. When it comes time to shine, you will be the light that helps people out of the dark.
This article goes into more detail on this subject: How to Live with Integrity.
- Take some time to look at the good things in your world:
The vast majority of people focus on what’s not working in their lives far more than they consider what’s working. Try to find all the positives in your life and the people on whom you can rely. Look around your home for artifacts that provide evidence of your success. This could be photos, collections, journals, trinkets, or the like. Once you gather your past successes, you’ll instantly feel better about yourself.
- Maintain a proper eye contact:
“Most people experience some insecurity regarding one or more of their physical traits.” — Gad Saad.
Get comfortable holding eye contact and
you’ll feel more secure in general.
We’ve all been in a situation where holding eye contact felt awkward or unnatural. If you ever feel that way, don’t necessarily look away, which can make you look shifty or nervous. Instead, try watching the person’s mouth, or even their nose or chin. This can help project the appearance that you’re still paying attention and engaged, without the awkwardness of direct eye contact.
Of course, remember to look away when the conversation naturally breaks — you don’t want to look like you’re staring the person down!
- Practice Optimism:
“I’ve made peace with insecurity… because there is no security of any kind.” — Dick Van Dyke.
The glass isn’t half full or half empty — it’s both, depending on your point of view. You can choose to dwell on the negative or focus on the positive. When you want to come across as more confident than you feel, be sure to focus on the positive before and during the interaction.
You can even frame the possibility of failure to yourself in a positive light: “Even if I mess this up, it will have been an amazing experience. I’ve learned so much.”
Read these articles for more on the topic of optimism:
– 11 Ways to Be More Optimistic and Increase Optimism.
– Have Increased Optimism: Using Self-Hypnosis To Be More Optimistic.
- Improve your posture:
Improving your posture is one of the greatest way to eliminate insecurity. Body language has a lot to do with how you feel about yourself. Try this: Stand up straight, throwback your shoulders, and lift your head. You can even put your hands on your hips. Feel a little like Superman or Wonder Woman? There’s a reason we associate that pose with superheroes! It oozes confidence.
Plus, research (Carney, Cuddy & Yap, 2010) shows that holding a “power pose” like this for as little as two minutes actually increases positive hormones in your body — and physically amps up your confidence.
- Fight your insecurity:
“Loneliness and rootlessness are just symptoms of an insecurity that assails us all when hitting this midlife moment. The world appears intent on blanking you out.” — Mariella Frostrup.
See it for what it is, and trust that it is usually temporary and you are wise enough to work your way out of this uncomfortable place.
Confidence can be worked on every day. If you start to believe in yourself, you’ll find that everyone else will believe in you too. Seek to eliminate your insecurity by taking small steps at a time. Brick by brick, you will become a fortified house of confidence that will stand tall for years to come – go banish your insecurity.
Have some of these themes here resonated with you? Then have a read of these pages:
1. Do you need help or support in a particular area of your life?
Coaching with Adam Eason Or Hypnotherapy with Adam Eason
2. Would you like a satisfying and meaningful career as a hypnotherapist helping others? Are you a hypnotherapist looking for stimulating and career enhancing continued professional development and advanced studies?
Adam Eason’s Anglo European training college.
3. Are you a hypnotherapist who is looking to fulfil your ambitions or advance your career?
Hypnotherapist Mentoring with Adam Eason.
Likewise, if you’d like to learn more about self-hypnosis, understand the evidence based principles of it from a scientific perspective and learn how to apply it to many areas of your life while having fun and in a safe environment and have the opportunity to test everything you learn, then come and join me for my one day seminar which does all that and more, have a read here: The Science of Self-Hypnosis Seminar. Alternatively, go grab a copy of my Science of self-hypnosis book, it’ll help you live with integrity!